Foremost is a referral I'd like to make for Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning
that has made a re-impression on me. It had been a long time since I first read it, but the second time around did not disappoint. I understand there's some controversy now about this book. Some believe Frankl only spent a few days at the Aushwitz death camp and that he even once worked at a hospital that did gruesome experiments on people. His editors deny this, but the bitter taste may still remain with some that this book is not as valid as once thought. Regardless, for me, it remains a strong autobiography of a man who endured incredible pain for many years and he gave a voice to those who suffered along with him.Frankl's premise is that a person cannot survive in this chaotic and sometimes cruel world without some sense of meaning for life itself. When you get right down to it, he's right. Those who gave up in the Nazi death camps were those who lost meaning in their lives. Surrounded by death and destruction, those who succumbed were those who drifted from their core understanding of themselves and their purpose in life. This is not to say there isn't the danger of random injustice and threats to one's life in the world, and understandably the conditions of a death camp made prisoners acutely aware of their powerlessness over the situation. Yet, among those who were not plucked for the gas chambers right away, there was one identifiable characteristic of the survivors... their will to live because even their miserable lives had meaning.
Frankl notes for the modern reader that there are innumerable examples of how ordinary people lose track of the meaning in their lives and suffer because of it. People with anxiety and depression have frequently given up on themselves. And, in something that is relevant for us at The Happy Hour, he claims that turning to drugs is a behavior that shows people have given up on their lives and lost the meaning in it. How many times have we heard from young people that they are bored with life, that they are drifting and that things are meaningless to them? How many times have people turned to drugs to either wash away pain or enhance pleasure as a way to avoid the certainty of realizing they do not know themselves or where they are heading in life? How many people die each day because they lost their way?
Frankl believed that the way to change this was not simply to create meaning in life that may not be there. He said that meaning is created through, of all things, suffering. What we are deprived of, or what sometimes hurts us, or what often threatens us can have embedded within the seeds of living a meaningful life. Nietzsche is to have said, "That which does not kill me, makes me stronger". This is the essence of Frankl's message. What we endure often defines our life, and if we endure suffering of one kind or another - the pains of living that seem common to all of us - we very often can stand strong against the inertia to give up the fight. Frankl, the psychiatrist, did this himself by studying the people who surrounded him in the death camps and learning from them. This gave his experience there meaning. So too can we learn from the everyday experiences of our existence how to live a meaningful life.
Being willing to stand tall against the suffering of cravings and urges to get high on drugs takes courage. That courage comes from having an abiding faith that reminds us that we do not endure this alone, that there can be some Higher Power in our life that gives it meaning and purpose. And, this driving life force is often enough to get us through that moment of suffering so we might live and not die of the ravages of alcoholism or drug addiction. In my practice I often concentrate on helping young men form the vision about their future that is based on finding meaning in their lives and the direction that comes from that meaning. I strongly believe in the old saw that "If you stand for something, you won't fall for anything". So it is with recovery. Standing for something, a life freely lived in harmony with the world around me, is the single most important feature of recovery for this addict. This is driven by an abiding faith that my life has meaning and that I ought not squander that life.
Frankl gave the world a brave book about the essence of life. I think the least we can all do is find through it the meaning behind our lives that propels us forward to what Bill W. called, "our happy destiny". That way each of us will demonstrate to the other person how well lived a meaningful life in recovery can be.
All the best, Roger W.
